Dear NOSE PICKIN' CAR DRIVERS,
Whatcha lookin' for up there, folks? Gold? Treasure? Your keys? Your license and registration?
Whatever you're searching for--I can see you really digging from over here in my car. And let me tell you, it is intense what is happening over there.
I suppose I can appreciate your private nose picking time. I would much rather have you digging in your car, rather than a table next to me at Chino, but I must say it's hard to sip on my Jamba Juice while I watch you scavenging for your breakfast.
I commend your perseverance at stoplights, and even your multi-tasking abilities while driving, picking, and singing along to Katy Perry's "Firework". Well done, chap.
I wonder many things while I watch you at this stop light. May I list them for you?
1. Do you have a tiny dashboard kleenex kit you could use?
2. Do you sanitize your steering wheel before letting a valet park it?
3. What happens when you find what you're looking for?
4. Is this something you do alone, or just while the kids from the carpool are in the back of the van?
5. Have you considered tinted windows?
6. Is this a self-soothing method you use to deal with stressful traffic situations?
7. Do you know I'm watching you?
8. Do you care that I'm watching you?
9. Do you do this with hopes that it will encourage me to pick as well?
10. WHY ARE YOU PICKING YOUR NOSE WHILE DRIVING?
Mmmk. Just some thoughts for you. Happy picking!