Sunday, March 27, 2011

Me, Myself, and I: How to Date Yourself

Ooooo la la! Look! I got flowers this week! 

And who gave them to me? 
(Go on! Go on! Let your minds wander! Who do you think gave me flowers?? Ooo la la! Giggle giggle)

Well.....I'll give you some hints.

This person is kind, charming, funnyish, thoughtful, intelligent-ish, and sometimes adorable.

They like me a lot. They are lovable, capable, and gosh-darnit, people like them!

Who was it?


Yup, I bought those little daisies for myself! 

Who says you can't date yourself? I'm gonna do it! I'm just gonna do it! (Wait! Mmmk..I bet a lot of people say that's not ok. I retract that statement! No wait, no I don't. I don't retract that statement at all. Pretend like this parentheses never happened. Ugh. Now I've confused us all! You guys, I'm really sorry. I suggest you go back to the top of this blog post and start reading again, when you get to the part where I say "Who says you can't date yourself?" don't read the part in the parentheses. Just move forward. Let's just pretend this doesn't exist. Ok. Let's try this again.)

(TAKE 2)

Who says you can't date yourself? I'm gonna do it! I'm just gonna do it! There's so much pressure to find a mate, but how well do we really know the mate we already have? Me and myself: Celebrating our 23rd Anniversary on May 21st. 

So, I did a little self-reflection about me. Fun fact about me: I'm a naturally anxious human being. My friends, my pillow pets, my family, and even my doctor all think I should just chill out a wee bit. When I sat down and thought about Anxious Me, I realized I don't give myself enough lovin' (please quickly remove your mind from the gutter so that we may continue....have you retreieved it? Wonderful. Let's move on!). Sure, I eat well and I like to hit up the Y every once and awhile (When I can figure out how to use the stairmaster!!), but when was the last time I did something nice for me? 

I started trying something out, a little something here, a little something there, and you know what?? It WORKED! I wouldn't say Anxious Me is gone, but I have certainly chilled out a lot! 

So, how do you date yourself? Some tips:

1. Flowers: 
Buy yourself flowers and place them by your bed. When you wake up in the morning and smell the glorious smells of spring wafting from your bedside table, you can't help but be happy. 

2. Tea Dates: 
Take yourself out on a tea date! Go to your local Tea Garden with your favorite book and spend an hour reading and being fabulous. (If I may suggest a book title "Mr. FunnyPants" by Michael Showalter has changed my life. Pick it up.)

3. Smile Parties: 
Guess what! You got invited to a party! It's called a SMILE PARTY! And if you don't wear a smile to the SMILE PARTY, your ass is getting kicked out! When is the party? It's RIGHT NOW! Hope you have your smile swagger on! 

4. Sweeten Up! 
No one wants to date a Debbie Downer, even you! So sweeten up! I'm sure if a scientist did an experiment about people being grumpy pants, they would find that no one likes a grumpy pants. That's scientific research right there! So put a smile on your face and a song in your heart! Sweeten up! 

5. Do you like those shoes? Buy them:
Let us not get out of hand with this tip! I don't want you to end up homeless with a fabulous shoe collection, but if you see a pair that speak to you--purchase them. I guarantee that while you are dating yourself, your date will ALWAYS notice your shoes! (You know why? Because you're dating yourself!...and you bought them....Are you getting this yet?)

6. Never pass up a time to be fabulous:
It is a well-known fact that when faced with a date with another human being many people spend some time looking nice for that person. So why not look nice for yourself? Spring dresses or casual bow ties too much for you on a daily basis? Then let's start with a shower! Take one! Your self-date doesn't want a Stinky Sammy. 

7: Museums, Zoos, and Movies! Oh My! 
That new exhibit at the Minneapolis Institute of Art calling your name? Go to it! 
Baby animals being born at a rapid rate at the Minnesota Zoo? Go to them!
Want to see the new "Jane Eyre" movie and have a good cry? Go to it!
There is absolutely no reason for one to miss out on the fabulousness of the city around them because they are a party of one! Go out into the world and see the things you love! The great part about this? Invite others to double date with you and yourself!

So why is dating yourself so important? Because new men come and go, but you are with yourself forever. Get to know you! You'll like them a lot! 

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