Wednesday, December 8, 2010

An Open Christmas Letter to...Pop Singers Who Use "Oh, Holy Night" as a Platform to Sing Their Faces Off!

(Celine Dion belts out a little "Oh, Holy Night")

Dear Pop Singers Who Use "Oh, Holy Night" as a Platform to Sing Their Faces Off,

Good for you guys! Rarely in modern pop music do we find the perfect song that let's us really blow our tops off, but you kids have found it. Thank you. Truly. You have taken the birth of our Lord and used it to your advantage. He was born to not only save you from your sins, but also to encourage you to sing so high that dolphins scurry to the surface to hear you proclaim the word of the Lord. 

When I snuggle into the Jetta for a warm winter drive through the snow, I shake out of my boots with excitement when I hear the first few notes jingle jangle from the radio. Here you are, your vocal chords sanded up for some hard work, your face loosened up with intensive Swedish massage...get ready world--you are going to sing "OH, HOLY NIGHT!"

I've employed a small man to be at your feet for today's performance of "Oh, Holy Night". I've equipped him with a small towel to dab the blood from your vocal chords, a sound-proof box to put you in, and a dust pan to wipe up your face from the floor after you sing it off! 

Keep singing, kittens. I'm really proud of you--and so is Jesus.

Merry Christmas!


Me case you doubt are some examples of mind-blowing "Oh, Holy Night" renditions, by some of Pop music's brightest and loudest stars...

(Mariah Carey screams her version "Oh, Holy Night")

(Carrie Underwood doesn't mess around on the high-notes in THIS version of "Oh, Holy Night")

...and finally, 

(Josh NOT messing around)

1 comment: