Recently I made a very large purchase. She is wonderful. She brings joy to my life. She purrs like a German kitten, and sings with the power of a Wagner aria. Yes, my midnight blue Jetta is one of my prized possessions. In recent days, though, I have noticed she has been getting abused. Hardcore! And you know what? I'm supey over it. So..an open letter to....THE BIRDS THAT ARE POOPING ALL OVER MY JETTA.
Dear THE BIRDS THAT ARE POOPING ALL OVER MY JETTA,
You guys! Stop it!
Jetta is not your bathroom, she is a car! A car that deserves love and respect. Either give Jetta the respect she deserves by flying down to Walgreens and strapping yourself into a diaper, or flap your little wings south for the Summer too. I'm over it, you guys. Get it together, it's 2010.